Monday, September 20, 2010


I have studiously tried to avoid ever using the word 'madness' to describe my condition. Now and again, the word slips out, but I hate it. 'Madness' is too glamorous a term to convey what happens to most people who are losing their minds. That word is too exciting, too literary, too interesting in its connotations, to convey the boredom, the slowness, the dreariness, the dampness of depression.

Friday, September 10, 2010

Young Mind, Pure Heart

Escapade by Ms. Jackson (if you're nasty.)

I always loved this song. It represented happiness, love, fun, family adventure, and sequins. Of course, I didn't find out until years later (college. seriously.) that I had misunderstood the lyrics. Oh, sorrow!

Come on baby let's get away
Let's save your troubles for another day
Come go with me we've got it made
Let me take you TO THE ICE CAPADES (let's go)

ICE CA-PADES we'll have a good time
ICE CA-PADES leave your worries behind
ICE CA-PADES you can be mine

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Tit Tit Pee Poo

Milk Milk
Around the Corner
Fudge is Made

You down with OCD? Yeah. You know me.

I can't sleep. But really, how can anyone sleep when there are things to be organized.

Alphabetically, reverse alphabetically, by color, by size, by shape, by purpose, by frequency of use, by season, by how you acquired said important things, by genre, by feeling said objects evoke, chronologically, reverse chronologically, stacked biggest to smallest, tallest to shortest, fattest to skinniest, by ability to grab treasure should there be a fire, by what the kitties should and should not destroy... GAH!

And then there is the pile of stuff I have to lug around with me for eternity because my Mom got it for me and getting rid of it, even to a loving home, somehow reflects my lack of love for her, makes me ungracious, and would ultimately lead to my failure as a daughter.

Tonight I am thankful to be a poor artist in NYC with a small apartment. Any bigger, and somebody is gonna have to call A&E, cause I am hoarding this whoreson out!

Saturday, September 4, 2010

My B. Her E.

This one. I love!
This year is our 10 year friendiversary.

Not only is she famous, brilliant, funny, and pretty... she's real sweet, too. And makes a mean mac & cheese and peanut butter cheesecake goo cake.

Tonight we went to a secret speakeasy, we hadn't had a playdate in ages, with phone booths, trap doors, and etiquette rules. We drank fancy cocktails and regaled with tales of men, art, college, life, and clothing. A much needed reminder that everything is gonna be just fine. Even when it's hard.

She's my herosisterfriend for life!

Thursday, September 2, 2010

The Luther

Why am I not asleep after 5 in the morning? Oh yeah, my tummy feels funny.

One Krispy Kreme doughnut, sliced and toasted, hamburger, cheese, special sauce, and a big ole slab of Canadian bacon. Crunchy frenchie fries on the side.

Eating this burger is an experience. There is the super sweet yummy glazed doughnut, the greasy burger, ample gooey cheese, salty bacon, and oozy sauce. Your mouth is immediately confused, then interested. It's too many delicious things all at once. Your tongue likes the texture, but can't figure out why its like that. Upon completion, you stumble around and slur your words, food drunk, and, if it's the hottest day ever (today), will probably get the meat sweats. You are full, satisfied, sick, and sugar rushed all at the same time.

Soon, you poop and crash. Your stomach doesn't quite hurt, but it is having a hard time digesting your dinner dessert combo. There will be no canoodling! Maybe pooting. You should try it. Once.

So, next time you want a burger, go that extra 500 calories and make it THE LUTHER!