Team Busy Bee. Team Llama.

I have been so busy! I haven't had time to keep this baby updated. And there has been so much! The following paragraph is my stream of conscience ramblings on what I would have blogged about if I had had time to blog:

I got asked to do a bit part in an upcoming movie, Shoplifting from American Apparel. I worked with this director before on the film The Human War and had a blast. I was also submitted for a JCPenny's commercial. I have been shopping there since I was an awkward teen in need of a business suit for DECA club and too chubby to find jackshit at the Limited Too. There is no reason why I shouldn't get cast. I consider it retribution for years of suffering in ugly ass clothes as a chubby young thing. Cudzoo is doing well. Can't wait to get in the studio. I got to visit with my forever friend Joe Pug. He's famous. You don't know him? You should. He will fix your soul. Fame's not making him an asshole, though. He was always an asshole. Dottie is doing better, she was a sick little kitten for a few days, but she still eats everything and gets tummy aches. She ate the straps off my tank top the other day. Brotherbear's band played at the Wildhorse Saloon in Nashville and killed it. He's kinda a big deal. I caught up with a great old college chumette. I discovered Sake. It fucks you up! I miss Quidditch because I'm always super busy on the weekends with weddings and rehearsals and life. I miss my broom and cape! Scream 4 was fun. As was Source Code and Insidious. It's warm enough to break out my vintage poncho. I figured out how to apply feather extensions. My kombucha is brewing steady. I need new sneakers. And tonight I am going to a Oh So Bad/Oh So Good Movie Screening Party of The Room. I can't wait!

Well, thats the jumbled update of my goings ons. Now to the gym. But not before I make your day/ruin your night with this sad, funny, not as sexy as a werewolf comparison pic:

OH SNAP!

From the couch... to the fireplace... to the chair... toss down a pillow bridge...

Oh shit, YOU'RE ON FIRE! GET! OFF!

Lava floor is the best.

ERIN GO BRA-LESS!

HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY!!

When I was a wee lass, I lived in Letterkenny, Ireland. My Dad's company sent him there, so Mom and I went, too. We set up house in Letterkenny and traveled all over Europe. They were filming National Lampoon's European Vacation when we were at the Eiffel Tower and we got a script. Chevy Chase thought I was super cute! Duh! I was very young, so I don't remember a lot. Specific memories include, things being green, sheep, picking up a rock at a castle, and getting sick. And I have snapshot memories of having a birthday party over there with all my Irish friends and getting a Bosco the Clown. As I was very young, I also picked up a bit of a brogue that quickly turned southern drawl upon returning to the states. I would be at least 38% more awesome if I still rocked the Lucky Charms accent. Bummer.

I will make it back one day. I mean, come on, Erin McCirish! It's so beautiful. And true to memory, green.

And this time I will be old enough to drink at ye olde pub. Well, legally.

Wear Green!!

Nanny By Day...

I babysit an adorable little red-headed sass machine. I started working with her when she was 5. Now she's 11! Whoa! She's like my own! What used to be titty tats (she couldn't say her 'k's) and coloring is now, 'How old are you when you have sex' and 'So... tampons. Where do they go?'

When I am not a Nanny, I am in a filthy dirty doo-wop band, tart clients up with hair and make-up, make sailors blush with my colorful explicatives, shoot whiskey like a pro, and often times perform in plays/films with questionable content.

Occasionally, Red has come along with me into my other life. She has sat backstage and pretended not to hear what is being said on the other side of the dressing room wall, she has met my weirdo friends, she has seen my perverse home decorating, and she was even there for part of the recording of the Cudzoo album. Sometimes she says 'ass' and 'hell', 'because they are in the Bible, so they aren't so bad', she explained.

Basically, she's the coolest and she has the coolest babysitter in the world, and gets to do super cool (mildly inappropriate) things that make her friends jealous. I even encourage her to get in a little trouble now and then as long as she understands that she has to suffer the consequences if she gets caught.

I hope she looks back on our time together one day and says, 'What the fuck were my parents thinking?!'

I love you, little soulmate!

Zombie Apocalypse Hat

Tonight, Sweetheart and I were rounding up our choice army in case of a zombie apocalypse. We were surprised at who did and did not make the cut. Did you? Well, we can't tell you until Z-day, but until then, you can start crocheting your official Team Super Survive headgear. Not only will it help prevent potential brain damage due to contusions (I'm fitting mine over my bicycle helmet), but it will also confuse zombies and remind your fellow team members that a zombie apocalypse is no time to lose your sense of humor!

Big Mac

Cause, see, my name is McCarson. Big Mac. No? Ok.

I have been coveting this dress for weeks. I have the picture, among other things I covet, saved on my desktop. Today, my dear friend Mametastic posted it on my facebook and said we needed them. I take this as a sign from the Universe (and Mametastic) that I do indeed need this dress. Sans the sesame seeds (they would murder Mudder) and maybe the veggies and cheese switched, so I have an adorable lettuce/tomato/onion tutu. I want it my way. That's why they call me Big Mac! (No one calls me that.)

BABE-ushka!

My Mummy Dearest collects nesting dolls. I don't know if she meant to. She got one in Europe when we used to live there. I remember playing with it when I was younger and liking it a lot. So, one Christmas, I got her a nesting doll. And the next Christmas, another. So on and so forth... And she started buying nesting dolls that were unusual. And Brotherbear began giving them to her, too. Now she has lots of beautiful unique nesting dolls. Even one I made of our family. Daisy (dog) in Brotherbear in me in Mummy in Father. I read or heard somewhere or made up that 'people collect things so you know what to get them for gifts.' Good enough reason for me! I collect lots of weird things, and I do like getting presents. Cause and effect, good reader. Cause and effect!

I worry she may acquire too many. We are under 20 and well below hoarder red flags, but still. Or that she didn't mean to have this collection. She's just too nice to say anything. Maybe next year I will think outside of the box and give her something more practical... her very own babushka nesting dress!

Unconditional LOVE!

He LOVES me so much his favorite sleep spot (when not between Sweetheart and me) is atop the dirty clothes. True LOVE!

Mommy.

Tells Blackman not to pick her up.

Makes adorable face.

Plays along.

Laughing at Yourself.

Life is too important to be taken seriously.

-Oscar Wilde

Parking Lot Horses.

Kitteh.

Meet Huckleberry Dinosaur and Oscar Bobcat. In spirit, Oliver Unicorn.

Sadly, tonight is Huck's last night at our apartment. He will be moving to a new home. I feel very sad. Oscar is his best friend, father, brother, and mentor. Huck loves Oscar too much and can't wait to cuddle him while they cat nap. Not only is he gonna be alone, but learning a new home, too. Oscar lost his brother Oliver and is now losing his little Huck, too. Is he going to feel like every fellow kitty will go away one day? I just feel very sad for them. Maybe I am giving them human emotions and I shouldn't because they are, well, cats. I think they understand more than we give them credit for. They have smart souls.

The silver lining? A new kitten!

MOMMY LOVES YOU, HUCK! I HOPE YOU HAVE A HAPPY NEW HOME!

Always a Babe!

My Daddy, heart shaped sunglasses, and a '69 MG. Let's roll!

FAVORITE!!!

My favorite, bestest, most beautiful, smartest, everything in the universe that is good person!

My Mama.

Gotcha!

My brotherbear used to call escalators sexulators. 'Mama, I wanna ride the sexulator!!!'

You are a disappointment.

JUGS.

This begs to be next years Christmas card.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!

Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!

I love you.

He Sees You When You're Sleeping.

Tickle My Digits.

I got a new phone.

From Santa.

A smart phone.

It confuses me a great deal.

Is there an app for that?