Team Busy Bee. Team Llama.

I have been so busy! I haven't had time to keep this baby updated. And there has been so much! The following paragraph is my stream of conscience ramblings on what I would have blogged about if I had had time to blog:

I got asked to do a bit part in an upcoming movie, Shoplifting from American Apparel. I worked with this director before on the film The Human War and had a blast. I was also submitted for a JCPenny's commercial. I have been shopping there since I was an awkward teen in need of a business suit for DECA club and too chubby to find jackshit at the Limited Too. There is no reason why I shouldn't get cast. I consider it retribution for years of suffering in ugly ass clothes as a chubby young thing. Cudzoo is doing well. Can't wait to get in the studio. I got to visit with my forever friend Joe Pug. He's famous. You don't know him? You should. He will fix your soul. Fame's not making him an asshole, though. He was always an asshole. Dottie is doing better, she was a sick little kitten for a few days, but she still eats everything and gets tummy aches. She ate the straps off my tank top the other day. Brotherbear's band played at the Wildhorse Saloon in Nashville and killed it. He's kinda a big deal. I caught up with a great old college chumette. I discovered Sake. It fucks you up! I miss Quidditch because I'm always super busy on the weekends with weddings and rehearsals and life. I miss my broom and cape! Scream 4 was fun. As was Source Code and Insidious. It's warm enough to break out my vintage poncho. I figured out how to apply feather extensions. My kombucha is brewing steady. I need new sneakers. And tonight I am going to a Oh So Bad/Oh So Good Movie Screening Party of The Room. I can't wait!

Well, thats the jumbled update of my goings ons. Now to the gym. But not before I make your day/ruin your night with this sad, funny, not as sexy as a werewolf comparison pic:

Tuppence.

Do you take sacagaweas?

My Little Apocalypse Pony

It's about to get real, My Little Death Ponies!

Sometimes things aren't what they seem. I am, of course, using this as a loose metaphor to compare people to My Little Ponies. As I feel like I am back on the elementary playground with all the secrets and fair-weathered friendships, I suppose a toy is an appropriate comparison. Like how they were once cute bathtub companions that filled Barbie's stall, and out of no where, they are evil creatures with no compassion or care for the feelings of others. My Little Spawns of Death! (I'm looking at the mid-to-late half of my mid-to-late 20's, I am old enough to embellish a bit.) What was once rainbows and glitter is now forgotten words and not getting invited to the sleep over flashbacks. So dumb. So enlightening. So hurtful. So boring. I really did like those cute little equines! C'est la vie.

Mad Haters and the Hare

Sometimes I feel like this. A tired rabbit mask person just trying to catch the carrot.

You think you have people in this world, friend people, to help swing the carrot in your direction, but it turns out they don't want to help you. They wanted to hop around with you when you had lots of carrots or when they thought they could have your carrot or when they felt sad and needed someone to make them feel better about their carrots. Then they drop you, say mean spirited things about you, and share their carrots with someone else. These friend people suck.

Well, fuck that and fuck them! When you get stuck in a carrot chasing rut, you just gotta get your shit together long enough to put things into perspective, like this little furry friend!

There are so many things for which to be thankful. I am lucky in so many ways. And I don't really like most of the dummies I let get me down, so that's silly! If that carrot is out of reach, fine! Grab something else. You'll get the carrot eventually. And when you feel like a sad rabbit, relax and give yourself a hand... to metaphorically bitch slap the haters!

Haters make me famous.

I Seek Amy!

I have a friend. Her name is Amy. Not only does she always know what song is playing in my head, but, also, she is dark. Real dark! Sick and twisted scary dark. And I LOVE IT! She is one of the few people I know who are willing to go ahead and go there. It doesn't matter who's watching or who is in the way, she is confident that they will move or happily suffer the consequences. Basically, I'm glad she's on my side, cause she will wreck you.

How did she put it? Perversion with a touch of class.

Other than myself, she is also the only other person I can think of who would wear these pieces of jewelry and think they are hilarious. Maybe we should get matching ones! Like really fucked up friendship bracelets, proudly announcing our need for attention. Yeah, I saw The Craft (like a bazillion times), I know which direction is cry for help and which way means business.

Yay! Needy Friends Forever!

CUDZOO does Don Pedros!

Zombie Apocalypse Hat

Tonight, Sweetheart and I were rounding up our choice army in case of a zombie apocalypse. We were surprised at who did and did not make the cut. Did you? Well, we can't tell you until Z-day, but until then, you can start crocheting your official Team Super Survive headgear. Not only will it help prevent potential brain damage due to contusions (I'm fitting mine over my bicycle helmet), but it will also confuse zombies and remind your fellow team members that a zombie apocalypse is no time to lose your sense of humor!

Unconditional LOVE!

He LOVES me so much his favorite sleep spot (when not between Sweetheart and me) is atop the dirty clothes. True LOVE!

My Quidditch Nickname.

A busty babe that can kick your ass. Obvi.

SHE-HULK!!!

Don't make her angry. You won't like her when she's angry.

Tiny Soul-mate.

Soul-mates come in all forms. Some more adorable than others.

Lady's Who Tea.

Tea, scones, and clotted cream with my favorite ladybirds at Tea and Sympathy. This is love!

Kitteh.

Meet Huckleberry Dinosaur and Oscar Bobcat. In spirit, Oliver Unicorn.

Sadly, tonight is Huck's last night at our apartment. He will be moving to a new home. I feel very sad. Oscar is his best friend, father, brother, and mentor. Huck loves Oscar too much and can't wait to cuddle him while they cat nap. Not only is he gonna be alone, but learning a new home, too. Oscar lost his brother Oliver and is now losing his little Huck, too. Is he going to feel like every fellow kitty will go away one day? I just feel very sad for them. Maybe I am giving them human emotions and I shouldn't because they are, well, cats. I think they understand more than we give them credit for. They have smart souls.

The silver lining? A new kitten!

MOMMY LOVES YOU, HUCK! I HOPE YOU HAVE A HAPPY NEW HOME!

FAVORITE!!!

My favorite, bestest, most beautiful, smartest, everything in the universe that is good person!

My Mama.

Factory Girls.

My friend Creighton made this. I love him to death and think he is amazingly talented, so I went to check it out. IT WAS FANTASTIC! The music and story were so moving and full. And those bitches could sing like beautiful belting angels. This will be a successful musical hit one day. Seek it out. Phenomenal!

Claybear.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, CLAYBEAR!

One of the most important people in my life! Forever!

Bieber Fever.

Today is my friend Kate's birthday. She's 11. This is what happens when a bunch of 11 year old girls play Pin the Hair on Justin Beiber.

Say Nay to SJP.

Like my friend Mamrie says, 'She looks like an unpainted witches mask.'

Yappy Hew Near!

Cornucopia of LOVE.

Feasting, celebrating, and being thankful for my life with Mom, Dad, Brother Bear, Sweetheart, Dr. Evil Pie Maker, and Brother from another Mother. Surrounded with love! And food.

It's So Hard...

When you're rich and famous you are the dominant force in a relationship, even if you try hard not to be. I've talked of sacrificing everything for Fleetwood Mac, but I realize now that it is simply the only thing I've ever wanted to do.

-Stevie Nicks

Sing it, Siren Sister! Being an artist person is hard. It's what I eat, sleep, breathe, preach, and love the most. Sometimes it makes everything else confusing and hard and complicated. I just want to do what I love always! You know?